On St. Patrick’s Day, most people wear green. On this St. Patrick’s Day, however, I was green. Green with envy. Lots and lots of envy.
My partner-in-crime and I were invited to a St. Patty’s/Housewarming party at the new home of an architect and her graphic designer husband. They had just moved from our historic-gone-ghetto-gone-gentrifying neighborhood to a historic-sans-ghetto neighborhood a few blocks away. When we got there, they were discussing all of the restoration/renewal projects they had in store for their adorable, vintage Craftsman. A home of their own, in a historic neighborhood, AND the ability to do homey projects on their home??? I was in drool-central the second we walked in – I want a home. *insert protruding, pouty lower lip here*
But really, if I was being honest, it’s not the house – it’s the fact that their lives are together enough that they are both ready for and able to have a home of their own.
My life isn’t ready – I’m not ready. And that’s when I started feeling the grrrrrr part of being green – Why isn’t my life ready? What’s wrong with me? After all, I’m 31 years old with a juris doctorate and some pretty coveted life experiences under my belt, so why haven’t all the pieces of my life fallen together yet? If other people can have their all already, where the *expletive* is mine…?
And just when I was about say a forceful goodbye (and good riddance!) to my pursuit of the well-rounded, balanced, fulfilling existence that I want for myself, the universe sent me a nice little reminder…in the form of Kansas University basketball coach, Bill Self (yes, really). Bill said something to the effect of, “Those other teams’ games have nothing to do with our game.”
While Coach Self was referring to two record-breaking NCAA tournament upsets that occurred immediately before his Kansas Jayhawks were about to play their own tournament game, he very well could have been talking directly to me – I can really only compare my life to MY life. Because who’s “all” is it that I’m looking for anyway? That’s right…